What Kind of Friend Are You?

Not a week goes by that I don’t get a request to be someone’s Facebook friend. What’s surprising is that I don’t know who they are! I think social networking is redefining friendship. I do realize there are all ‘types’ of friendships: the “hi, how are you,” the “stay-in-touch,” “let’s do lunch,” “chat-after-church.” And then there the friends you share your heart with.

Toward the end of his earthly ministry, Jesus promoted the disciples from servants to friends, describing a friend as one who shares his thoughts and plans—the secrets of his heart (John 15:14-15). This is reminiscent of God’s relationship with Abraham: “shall I hide [my plans] from Abraham” (Genesis 18:17). Up to that point, Abraham’s relationship with God was that of a loyal servant. But on that day, Abraham was promoted—from servant to friend. Accordingly, as a friend, he feels free to question God about His plans—Abraham shares his concerns and in return wants to understand God’s heart. I think Abraham’s questions must have pleased God.

Jesus said to the disciples “if you are my friends, you will keep my commandments.” At first blush that sounds more like servanthood than friendship. But Jesus is saying something like this: “before you obeyed me as a servant does his master, but now I want you to obey me because you love me and want to please me.” They were promoted from ‘workers for’ to ‘partners with.’

By the way, the story of Mary and Martha sheds light on this subject. While Martha was serving Jesus in the kitchen, Mary was sitting with Jesus in the parlor. So what kind of friend are you? Do you spend more time in the kitchen or the parlor? Maybe this is your promotion day!